For those of you who don’t know, my name is Alisa Starr, and I make Snarky Cards: Brutally Honest Greeting Cards. I sell them in bars from a box that hangs beneath my boobs. They will crack you the fuck up.
Last month I did First Thursday with the girls from Radish Underground, and it totally fucking rocked! The booze was yummy (and free), the snacks were upscale and everyone who stopped by was clever and attractive. It was the ideal night, and I make a lot of good custom Snark. Also: I found out that Gina’s new husband is so fucking good at making Snarky Cards! He has the rhythm down pat. And also: He loves television as much as I do. It was like meeting myself, if I had a penis.
I stopped by the store a few days later to talk about how awesome we are. “I can’t believe I found the male version of me embedded in your Vagina!” I exclaimed. “Yeah.” Gina agreed. “He’s really excited about being your apprentice too.” She helped a customer while Celeste and I congratulated ourselves on our aweseomeness some more. “Do you think that Gina would let me play with her husband?” I asked nervously. Some girls get weird about that. Celeste snickered. “No, I get to play with him all the time!” It was rad, and a little strange. I’m sure you all have heard about my raging labido, and I do like Gina’s husband a lot. But he’s so much like me, I couldn’t make a crush happen. I mean, I already know I like myself. I don’t have to make a big deal about it, you know?
Come get your Snark on, stare at my cleavage, drink some free booze, meet my typewriter, Bob, look at some hot jewelry and sexy new clothes, and bask in the duality of me and me + penis!