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Category Archives: Stories from The Bar
seamlessly
Dear Internets, I seem to have seamlessly slipped into my new life. I’ve been volunteering at Twilight Artist Collective, and this week, Joy and I saw the Muppets movie together. We texted Stephenie, because he loves the muppets more … Continue reading →
Posted in Alisa has feelings, New Cards, Place I'll be, Snarky Cards, Stories from The Bar |
Tagged 22 doors, Alisa Starr, Alisa Starr comedy, Christmas Snarky Cards, emotional honesty, friendship, janis from The Muppets, Joy Shumaker, Miss Piggy, Molly Ringwald, nerve, New Snarky Cards, Snarky Cards, Snarky Cards discount, Snarky Paintings, Spoken Word Night at 22 doors, the muppets movie, Twilight Artist Collective |
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Moving On
Dear Internets, As some of you know, my name is Alisa Starr. I make Snarky Cards: Brutally Honest Greeting Cards. I sell them in bars from a box that hangs beneath my boobs. They will crack you the fuck up. … Continue reading →
What’s Going On
I grew up in a Christian Church, you might have heard of them, they’re called the Baptists. My parents practiced a different kind of Christianity at home. I may have mentioned to you before, my parents are demon-hunters, and God speaks to my Mother on the phone. Which are both things that Baptists don’t get with. So Jon and Sherri (said parents) were in the closet about their freaky form of Christianity until 4-5 years ago. When they came out of their Crazy Christian Cult Closet, their church promptly kicked them out. I’m pretty sure that they’ve actually been kicked out of a few churches since they came out. But they’re worried I’ll make fun of them, so they don’t keep me that informed these days. They’re probably right. Continue reading →
Posted in Alisa has feelings, Hot Sexy Time!, Snarky Cards, Stories from The Bar |
Tagged aebleskivers, Alicia, alicia hot bitch, Anna, annoying anna, Bachelorette party, baptists, Bumbershoot, Child Sex Abuse, Crazy Christian Cult, cross-eyed people, fire dancer, girl time, high school, Joy the model, KT, losing Something Important, molested, piano bar, Portland, Something Important, the barell room, the circus, The Slingshot, The Universe |
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Art Prostitution at it’s best
Dear Internets, My name is Alisa Starr. I make Snarky Cards: Brutally Honest Greeting Cards. I sell them in bars from a box that hangs beneath my boobs. Like tonight, for instance, I went selling at The Sidestreet, and The … Continue reading →
Posted in New Cards, Place I'll be, Snarky Cards, Stories from The Bar |
Tagged art prostitution, bar life, Bar Selling, Dating, Love, relief, Snarky Cards, Superalisa |
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Seattle: Totally Dig It
My name is Alisa Starr. I make Snarky Cards: Brutally Honest Greeting Cards. I sell them in bars from a box that hangs beneath my boobs. They will crack you the fuck up. Usually I sell them in Portland bars. … Continue reading →
Posted in It Happened In My Vagina, Stories from The Bar |
Tagged boobs, Joy, New Snarky Cards, Seattle, sexy time, Sisters, Snarky Cards, The Comet, the wild rose, WA |
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I heart Eugene!
As some of you may know, I’m Alisa Starr and I make Snarky Cards: Brutally Honest Greeting Cards. I sell them in bars from a box that hangs beneath my boobs. They will crack you the fuck up. Last week, … Continue reading →
Posted in It Happened In My Vagina, Stories from The Bar, Uncategorized |
Tagged Buffalo Exchange, Eugene, New Snarky Cards, Olive Juice, Snarky Cards, Vagina Spiders |
2 Comments
“It’s called friendship. It’s like therapy for poor people.” -Without a Trace
Friday night I went to the Battlestar Galactica showing at The Baghdad Theater, with my Snarky Cards in tow. It was packed. And it was fun. Cort and Fatboy -the radio guys who threw this gig together- announced a couple … Continue reading →
Posted in Stories from The Bar, Uncategorized |
Tagged Battlestar Galactica, broken leg, Cort and Fatboy, Dorks, friendship, Geeks, Hippy Shit, Invisible Robot Sex, Jake, Kelly's Olympian, Nerd Sex, Nerd-gasm, Pam and Lindsey, Portland Icon, Robot Sex, Seattle, Shit On Your Coffee Table, Snarky Cards, Space Monkey Coffee, The Universe, Viagra, VooDoo Doughnuts, wheelchair |
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Knocking you Up!
I betcha thought that you needed some penis and vagina action in order to get knocked up, huh? Nope. It’s not true. It’s just Jaeger. You drink enough of it, and a baby magically starts growing inside of you. That’s why I don’t touch the stuff. I stick to whiskey, and I’ve been baby-free for 15 years. Continue reading →
Posted in Hot Sexy Time!, New Cards, Stories from The Bar, Uncategorized |
Tagged babies, bars, Berbati's Pan, body, dancing, Fenbi, Jaeger, Love, pregnancy, Sex, Snarky Cards, The Ash Street Saloon, whiskey |
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Super-Alisa Strikes Again!
For those of you who don’t know: My name is Alisa Starr. I make Snarky Cards: Brutally Honest Post Cards. Once I’ve got ‘em made, I sell them in bars from a box that hangs beneath my boobs. They’ll crack … Continue reading →
Posted in Stories from The Bar |
Tagged bar, Broken, Sex, Snarky Cards, Superalisa, The Bonfire Lounge, The Cute Bartender, whiskey |
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